The current buzz is all about parenting styles and in particular, we are all comparing ourselves to Tiger Mom - Amy Chua. Are we like her? Should we be like her? Is she a terrible mom or a great mom?
These are all questions that everyone is pondering and no one will know until we see the outcome of her children. Many of us disagree with what we have heard and read about her parenting, especially here in the United States - but why is this?
It is my philosophy that parenting should be approached with intention, something that Chua alludes to as well. The outcome is what we need to keep in mind. What do we want for our children as they emerge into adults?
In the article featured in Time Magazine, Chua states that her focus is on her children's happiness, but that is something that will come in the future, not now. I think this is what is difficult for most westerners, as her philosophy rob's her children of their 'childhood'. Am I right?
What I see in the unstated outcome of this scenario, is that mom, being the crouching tiger, trying to control her daughters every move as they grow up has backfired. What she did not realize is that her children, like all children are not to be controlled. To attempt to control children leads to rebellion, the smarter the child, the more rebellious they become. In this case, the youngest daughter, Lulu is the hidden dragon, the unrecognized autonomous intellect, that is not to be tamed. She is determined to become her own person and develop her own interests.
To set an intention of happiness for our children is certainly not a bad thing and it is not as limiting as choosing a career path or marriage partner for them, but pushing them to the extent that this mom does is what is uncomfortable and questionable.
What do you think of this position? Is there any room for this kind of pressure and what will the outcome of this pressure manifest into?
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